Topic: just for fun

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I'll volunteer my kitties as ship's cats.
Liz

Have you got nine the captain may need them

QUOTE:

I am so fed up. First I don't get invited to the Celebrity 'freebie' and now I don't even get a job on your new cruiseship! Surely there must be something I can do? How about crafts, I could teach knit your own formal night outfit or something. Please let me be on your ship, you can have my tips...Carol

Sorry missed you out but we really need a craft shop Knitted dinner suitswill sell well on the Antarctic cruise and you can charge tips!:D

QUOTE:

Not sure how I got to be Cruise Director...
Not even sure what that job entails.. :o ..but would prob. accept, and tough it out!

Always saw myself as Ship's Photographer, on this new ship of ours...

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That’s another job filled you can rip of the passengers with high cost pictures,:D at the same time as explaining that we must spend another day at sea due to high winds;) (port costs) so that the Redwinegirls can fill the bar with thirsty people, make more money and all the passengers crawl to bed by 11.00 pm great idea.:p

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Now then..
How are we going to bring this to reality?
Everyone puts ten thousand Pounds into the pot, to get it started?
Or do we seek venture capital? :D
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No problem we lease the ship on a ninety day turnaround sell of all the cabins while we hang out the negotiations. Charge a high price for the cabins with self room service (tiny print and a novelty) charge a daily rate for the service. We should be solvent in the first couple of weeks. We can have a maiden voyage an inauguration voyage an inauguration year. Then a renaming and start again new company no tax.

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You will be to busy giving riding lessons the only riding school afloat that’s the special pull to fill the ship. :DWho needs a flow rider when we have a horse rider? Mmm the rest of the time it will be mucking out

Water polo in the pool :D

and Liz can take Mrs. Slocombe's place and talk about her pussy

QUOTE:

That’s another job filled
- you can rip off the passengers with high cost pictures,
at the same time as explaining that we must spend another day at sea due to high winds (port costs)
so that the Redwinegirls can fill the bar with thirsty people, make more money
and all the passengers crawl to bed by 11.00 pm -great idea.

Right.
Well at least I've got my job description now!
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QUOTE:

No problem --we lease the ship on a ninety day turnaround
sell of all the cabins while we hang out the negotiations.
Charge a high price for the cabins with self room service (tiny print and a novelty)
charge a daily rate for the service. We should be solvent in the first couple of weeks.
We can have a maiden voyage, an inauguration voyage, an inauguration year.
Then a renaming and start again -new company -no tax.

Imaginative Financing!
Sounds like you do this sort of thing for a living. ;)

Well thought out...I think?
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Photos:

I reckon for every one photo sold they throw away 50. So Aplmac you can take lots of lovely photos, we sell them for $2 each so everyone will just end up buying all of them. You do the maths (sell 1 in 50 at $20 or 50 at $2) so much more profit. I dont know why the ships photographers cant work that one out for themselves.

Sun Beds:

Coloured stickers will be given to a deck chair monitor (any volunteers?) Any sun lounger which has been vacated but still has belongings on will be issued with a coloured sticker (there will be a different colour for every half hour) If the sunbed still remains unused after half an hour, the belongings will be removed and kept at the deck chair monitors station for collection.


Any more suggestions?


Tours/Excursions manager (vacant position)
Giving good advice on DIY Trips

If I invest my recent lottery win (£10) can I be the resident drunk sitting at the bar during the carnage when the ship burns/turns turtle etc etc. Of course I will emerge unscathed!

QUOTE:

If I invest my recent lottery win (£10)
can I be the Resident Drunk sitting at the bar
during the carnage when the ship burns/turns turtle etc etc. ?
Of course I will emerge unscathed!

Dear Resident Drunk,
You're hired!
You're the perfect person for that job.
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