QUOTE:
We have lists for what we take with us, but how about a list of what not to bring back (you might spot a little help from Gilbert and Sullivan - "The Mikado")
As some day it may happen that a present must be found
I’ve got a little list, I’ve got a little list
Of all those souvenirs which do in every port abound
And they’d none of them be missed, they’d none of them be missed
There’s the five pound Rolex watches and the ten pound Gucci bags
Which are perfect for the ladies who would like to think they’re Wags
There’s jewellery and sunglasses and locally brewed gin
Which tastes as if too much will send you to the loony bin
All sold to you by traders who insistently persist
And they’d none of ‘em be missed, they’d none of ‘em be missed.
There’s the reindeer hides in Norway and the castanets in Spain
I’ve got them on the list, I don’t think they’d be missed
The stuff you fall in love with but it won’t fit on the ‘plane
It never would be missed, it never would be missed
The hat for Auntie Edna and the scarf for Uncle Jim
The chocolates for your mother (yes I know she ought to slim)
The water-colour paintings showing all the local sights
The postcards with the pictures of the city neon lights
The knick-knacks and the trinkets which you never can resist
I don’t think they’d be missed, I’m sure they’d not be missed.
There’s olive oil in Italy and baklava in Greece
They’re also on the list, they never would be missed
The alcohol you try to smuggle past the ship’s police
That isn’t on the list, Oh boy that would be missed
The Venetian mask you buy but never actually use
The model of the ship which will remind you of the cruise
The bottle of Madeira from the year that you were born
The tiny pink bikini which you know will not be worn
It really doesn’t matter what you put upon the list
For they’d none of ‘em be missed, they’d none of ‘em be missed.
....Carol
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